Gay Veteran’s Heartbreaking Obituary Reveals Lifelong Secret: “I Was Gay All My Life”
“Now that my secret is known, I’ll forever Rest in Peace.”
USA Today reports on a decorated veteran’s posthumous coming out. His final words left a bittersweet impact during Pride month.
Col. Edward Thomas Ryan was an Army vet and retired firefighter from New York. His obituary in the Albany Times shared a lifelong secret — he was gay. Ryan wrote the note himself, saying he hid his truth out of fear:
“I was afraid of being ostracised by Family, Friends, and Co-Workers. Seeing how people like me were treated, I just could not do it.”
“I Was Gay All My Life”
Ryan lived in Rensselaer, New York. He received honors like the National Defense Service Medal and Conspicuous Service Medal. Ryan was also a firefighter, Vietnam Veterans Committee chairman, and co-owner of WHRL-FM radio station.
His obituary listed accomplishments, sacrifices, and community contributions. But it ended with a revelation about love and acceptance he couldn’t find in life: “I was Gay all my life… I was in a loving and caring relationship with Paul Cavagnaro… He was the love of my life. We had 25 great years together.”
“You Were A True Hero”
Hundreds commented on Ryan’s obituary, wishing him peace with his partner Paul. Many expressed sadness they couldn’t love openly.
A mother wrote: “You showed the world how amazing a gay person can be. As the mother of gay children, I am forever in your debt.”
A gay man related: “I am so glad Edward had the love of his life, Paul for 25 great years and now for Eternity. Bless you both.”
Ryan’s message spread far, even if he couldn’t see the impact. His truth will help others find courage.
