From The Editor: The Trouble With Nazis
Andrew Creagh is pissed off at neo-Nazis – they have stolen his all-black look, hijacked the Australian flag, and are doing gay bushwalking. He has thoughts.
Don’t get me started!
I’m pissed off I am at the neo-Nazi movement. For a start, they’ve stolen my look! I love wearing black. It’s slimming, right? I love a black baseball cap. Not that my head needs slimming – at the rate I’m losing hair, it needs thickening, but I digress.
These days, thanks to the neo-Nazi movement, getting around in a classic, all-black look, with a baseball cap, and some facial hair – especially if you’re a middle-aged white guy like me – risks being mistaken for someone who thinks Asian people should start eating sausages and mashed potato, that Muslims should spend more time at the pub, and that anyone who doesn’t integrate into “our way of life” should go back to where they came from.
That’s very not what I think.
But wait, there’s worse! Because neo-Nazis are too cowardly to show their faces in public, they often wear balaclavas. And, yes, I have a balaclava! In fact, what I have is called a snood, and you wear it when bike riding to protect your face.
Next, the neo-Nazis have hijacked the flag. The other day, I saw a group of people walking along waving the Australian flag. I thought they were off to a rugby match but, no, they were on their way to attend an anti-immigration rally. Waving our flag. My flag!
Nazis ruin everything!
Apart from limiting my fashion options, Nazis are annoying in many other ways. They want to restrict immigration because they think it’ll solve the housing crisis. Wrong! There’s a housing crisis because of an undersupply of houses, and there’s not enough skilled migration to supply the workforce to build the houses. We need more skilled migrants, not less.
Nazis think people who come to this country should assimilate with the culture – just like the British assimilated with the Indigenous culture when they arrived, right?
And, finally, neo-Nazis are annoying because lots of people think they are gay. It’s all men; strapping young men, with gay facial hair, gay shorts, doing gay gym training together, going on long gay bushwalks together, and “camping” weekends.
Listen lads, if you want some cock, there are easier ways to get it than by joining some sad little fascist fan club and marching around Melbourne in a mask!
I do feel a bit sad for the neo-Nazis, though. No one is born racist. Someone has taught them racism. Someone has poured hate and vitriol into them and deprived them of all the depth and texture and colour that life has to offer.
Maybe that’s why they wear black. And because it’s slimming.
Readers, this month’s issue is decidedly unNazi! We have heaps of eye candy, a revealing interview with Sydney’s Deputy Lord Mayor, Zann Maxwell, a truly jaw-dropping story on the “Pansy Craze” of a century ago, and an interview with the “good boy next door”, content creator, Jace Starr.
Enjoy, and please email your feedback.
Andrew Creagh, Founding Editor
Email your feedback to [email protected]
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